As the Lieutenant Treasurer of this noble agency it behooves me to inform you that we are... bankrupt. Yes, *sigh* we are. We do not desire to be rich and famous, all we want to be able to accomplish is the successful education of this country on the correct spelling of 'definitely' (That is def - in - ite - ly). In order to make sure everyone spells this significant word correctly we need a minimal amount of financial resources, in order that we may reach as many Americans as possible. Therefore, we ask you to assist us in spreading the word by purchasing a definitely t-shirt or mug. We also implore you to educate yourself, as well as your friends, family, and co-workers on the correct spelling of definitely.
Thank you so much for your concern, participation, and support of this excellent agency. Have a blessed day!
Lieutenant Treasurer, DDA